Introspection is essential for two reasons primarily: for plotting the course ahead, and for healing wounds of the past.
Life is a journey. It has a beginning and an end. Both are unknown to us. We cannot remember our beginnings, nor do we know when or where or how our lives will end.

Consider planning a trip for business or for a family holiday. What do you do?
First you choose a destination.
Second you plan a route, often with a roadmap.
Third you plan stops along the way.
All these steps presuppose that you know where you are starting from.

The journey of life works exactly the same way.
You have a dream, a big picture, and a vision.
You know there will be stops along the way for the big events. There will be education, marriage, children, a home, moving from one location to another, maybe even emigration. If you think carefully, you will also know that there will be speed bumps, grief, financial difficulty, and a plethora of possible unplanned events.
Do you have a diagram of the proposed journey? Do you know where you are coming from? Do you know yourself? Have you ever taken the time to truly introspect? What is your foundation? Do you have clearly defined values? How will you react under pressure? What are you willing you compromise?

These are tough questions and each one demands an answer. It has been my experience that if we don’t address these issues intentionally, life’s journey will create circumstances which will force us to address them. When this happens, it is rarely a pleasant situation. The timing is almost always awkward and we are not prepared for it. Why would you wait for a tragedy to make changes? Tragedies do take place, and often without warning, but we can be prepared, and see them in better context. They do not have to be devastating or be so debilitating that it takes years to recover.

As I have discovered and is well documented in many of John Maxwell’s books, life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it. And being prepared is a major key which acts as a shock absorber to life’s major events. Here are a few principles to follow and practice.

1. Do not live in denial. Accept reality, but remain optimistic. This problem will not last forever.
2. Focus on the future. Hold on to the dream.
3. Take responsibility. Problems introduce us to ourselves. Get to know yourself better.
4. Forgive often. Do not hold grudges. It frees us.

It is therefore essential to have a solid foundation; a character built on rock and not on shifting sand. It starts with knowing who we are through introspection. I believe that hard times exist to teach us, and that there is a lesson in every difficulty. We seldom learn when times are good. We grow our character during and after difficulties. I found that an effective way to introspect is to look at myself through the eyes of someone else as well as through the eyes of God. This enables me to inspect my role in the event, as well as my behaviour before, during and after it.

Introspection requires courage and brutal honesty. It takes courage because we know that when we dig into our character, we may well come face to face with things we don’t like, and which force us to take painful action. Everyone has character defects, but not everyone wants to acknowledge them, own them, and take remedial action. Only people who accept reality, take responsibility, and make adjustments can grow effectively.

It is well documented that people accumulate ‘baggage’ as they journey through life. This baggage comes in two forms; it either burdens and weighs us down, or it enriches our lives because we learn from it. One is negative and prevents us from moving forward, and the other is positive as it liberates us to move from one destination to the next. This is a matter of attitude.

It is a certainty that life will deliver knocks, some hard, some very hard, some tragic. Most of them will involve our emotions on some level. Some will involve finances and make us feel insecure, some will involve betrayal and leave us feeling bewildered and disillusioned, and some may be a family tragedy like death which leaves us devastated. The common denominator is that they are all outside of our control, and all of them have the potential to stunt our growth, keep us in bondage, and keep us looking behind instead of forward.

This is where reflection and introspection come in. Introspection introduces us to a heart inspection, produces an acknowledgement and acceptance of the event, and makes room for an opportunity to pause for a reality check. You may feel anxious, fearful or lost, and that your life has been derailed. Introspection allows you to draw on the inner strength which exists in all of us. Introspection removes unhealthy denial or toxic positivity, and makes room for healthy optimism with a realisation that this situation won’t last forever.

Introspection gives us an opportunity to make a fresh start; it allows us to make contact with our souls; it fuels hope; it strengthens us; it shines a light on our blind spots, and finally it links up with our roadmap for the future. Honest introspection is the fuel for internal growth, which in turn fuels external growth.

Average people do not introspect, and tend to drift through life, arriving at unintended and unplanned destinations by accident. I confess to being acquainted with this way of life. As it happens, I have survived stage four cancer which could so easily have taken my life, but which gave me an opportunity for deep reflection and introspection. This has led to a series of life-changing decisions, and I am making the most of this fresh chance at sharing the insights gleaned during the illness, treatment, and recovery.

The John Maxwell coaching and teaching programs have made sense of my past, given clarity to the present, and provided a roadmap for the future. They have created in me a desire to lead an intentional and purposeful life. I am very grateful for this chance at helping people navigate through imposed limitations. We all deserve an opportunity at true significance.

I love this cowboy saying:
“You can’t fix a broken wagon wheel,
But you can use the parts to make a new one”.

John Maxwell
“Reflection turns experience into insight”.

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